A proactive approach to relationships & marriage

marriage problems: communication & conflict resolution for couples

Have you ever heard a husband or a wife say: "I want a divorce—my partner understands me."?

Understanding your partner doesn't mean giving in. Some conflict is inevitable in marital relationships, as in any relationship. Avoiding conflict is not a recipe for a happy marriage - - but managing conflict is.

It helps to understand how marital conflicts tend to spiral out of control:

- You don't feel that your partner is really hearing you, and your partner doesn't feel you're hearing them...

- So you both keep putting more and more emphasis on what you want the other person to hear (your side of the story, the side they don't seem to be aware of)...

- As a result, each of you feels that the other person is only bent on hearing their side of the argument... and each of you feels more desperate that you'll ever be heard and understood.

- And why would you listen to somebody who does such a poor job of listening to you? It becomes an issue of pride -- you just won’t be the first one to back down!

It takes a conscious effort to reverse the vicious cycle of miscommunications. But it's well worth the effort.

See: marriage counseling & relationship coaching.


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